chocolate is a verb

colors, flavors, whims and other growing things

Tag Archives: self-esteem

mud

1940s Dorothy in mudAmong the many photos of my mother looking well-groomed — even her most casual clothes selected with care, her curly hair coiffed — there are a few, like this one, where playful replaces meticulous. Dripping with mud, neck to toes, she stands in a ditch looking messy and relaxed.

Like any person who doubts their own beauty — and really, who is immune to such doubts? — Dorothy was seduced by the promised magic of fashion and potions that could make her sleek and lovely, or at least less different. Within such promises was also the suggestion that lovelier meant more lovable and she labored throughout her life to feel that she was someone who could be loved. In her appearance, as in her artwork, she longed for the favorable opinion of others and struggled to accept — and appreciate — the qualities that were uniquely her own.